You just made my list!

It’s amazing but there are still people out there sticking to the story that Sarah Palin is qualified to be Vice President. Are-you-kidding-me? These people actually have the balls to try and blame the fictional “east coast gotcha media” for being unfair to her. FUCK OFF with that nonsense. These people running for the highest office in our country (and in many ways the world) deserve to be grilled, RELENTLESSLY! Not to mention the fact that if Sarah Palin can’t survive a softball interview from Katie Couric, let me say that again KATIE COURIC, then how the hell is she supposed to handle the incredible, unending pressures of the White House?

If I hear one more person say “I like Sarah Palin because she is just like me” I am going to poop in their shoes. Guess who I don’t want in the White House? ME or YOU! I want the President and/or Vice President to be intelligent on an intimidating level. I want them to be so knowledgeable that I would be terrified to eat dinner with them. I want them to understand me and relate to the average American but I don’t want them to be as dumb as the average American.

For me this clip sums up why I can’t stand Sarah Palin. She starts with a lame joke, although I don’t understand how someone’s vast experience is actually funny, then trips all over herself trying to defend a joke that ACTUALLY also makes fun of 72-year-old John McCain. Palin sounds like a teenage boy who has just been caught by his mother jerking off but tries desperately to offer an excuse. “Uh, I was combing my hair and the comb fell into my pants and I was trying to get it out but it was stuck so I really had to tug at it then my pants fell off by accident and I could not find the comb so I was looking for it, that’s all.”

Apparently when it comes to newspapers and magazines Sarah Palin “reads all of ’em.” So many that she is unable to name any.

This is no joke people. Try and imagine this woman as President if McCain was to die in office. Who could possibly trust this woman to run the country when she can’t even handle easy questions? We have already suffered through 8 years of this bullshit, it is time for change. I am right, I know everything!

Download the awesome Sarah Palin “NOPE” poster here!

Please forgive me for keeping this one short and sweet but I can only focus my attention on this woman for so long before my heart rate drops and my eyes close. If not careful, I will soon be sleeping right here in my chair just waiting for the inevitable startling crash of my face slamming against the keyboard.

Jillian Barberie is annoying! Don’t try and tell me about her hot body either because it is permanently attached to that obnoxious personality of hers. I just can’t stand loud women who babble on and on about nothing. It’s true that I also don’t like this trait in men but when it comes from a woman it goes straight to my sack. I also hate girls who can’t shut up about how much they “love sports.” Fine, love sports but stop yelling at me about it. Can you just stop yelling in general, my sack is killing me.

While we’re at it can we put an end to “Good Day LA?” What kind of a person can actually sit through that shit? Dick Cheney should use it as torture. God that guy loves him some torture doesn’t he? I would love to lock Dick Cheney in a room with Jillian Barberie Reynolds for 30 minutes because you know one of those douchebags is not making it out alive.

Here, see if you can make it all the way through this
(men, hold on to your sacks)